In today’s episode of The Stepmom Side Podcast, we dive into one of the most frustrating and emotionally-charged dynamics stepmoms face: when your partner sides with the kids and leaves you feeling unsupported. Ever find yourself thinking, “Wait, am I the problem here?” or “Why do I feel like I’m living in the emotional Hunger Games?” Trust me, you’re not alone.
Here’s what we’re unpacking in this episode:
1: The Gut Punch of Being Sided Against
We’ve all been there — you bring up your stepkid’s disrespect or challenging behavior, and instead of backing you up, your partner throws out, “Well, they’re just kids.” Ouch. In this section, Alicia shares how she felt like an outsider in her home when she experienced this, and how it led to resentment building up fast.
2: Why It Happens (Dad Guilt, Am I Right?)
Let’s get real. Many parents, especially dads, are navigating a thick fog of guilt. Divorce guilt, remarriage guilt, and guilt from not being with their kids full-time. This guilt often leads them to defend their kids — even when they’re in the wrong. We dive deep into understanding the why behind their behavior, so you don’t feel like it’s personal.
3: What This Does to YOU
When your partner defends the kids, it can feel like you’re being invalidated. Over time, you start disengaging, silencing yourself, and questioning your role. This section is a gut check on how this dynamic can drain you emotionally and make you feel like you’re in a constant state of “I can’t do this anymore.”
4: What To Do About It
Time to shift from frustration to action. Alicia breaks down 4 concrete steps to help you address this issue with your partner and set boundaries to protect your peace. These include having a ‘Team Talk,’ using “we” language, and understanding when it’s time to step back and delegate certain responsibilities. Plus, she shares a personal story about the turning point in her relationship when things finally shifted.
If you’re dealing with this dynamic, you don’t have to navigate it alone. Join The Stepmom Side Community for real-time support from women who get it. Or, if you’re ready to dive deeper and get personalized help, my coaching is where the magic happens.
💌 Know a stepmom who could use this advice? Share this episode with her — she’s not crazy, not overreacting, and most importantly, she’s not alone.
